Random bouts of insane.

Maybe it's the Haloperidol wearin'off, or tha 6 pack of Tecate I took wit tha Haloperidol, but I got some itchy sh!t on tha brain. These are'nt in any particular order. This is...ahh eff it. Enjoy.

#Random: Fellas..Have you ever cut one finger off your suede gloves, put it on your penis and pretend you bought your penis a suede pull over? (Works wit leather too. It's more chic.)

#Random: I once dated a woman, who was a Vegan. While havin' lunch one day she stated "Don't kiss me after you eat that hamburger. I can't stand that meat taste" Now, I don't have a problem wit that. BUT, I had just chimney swept her  Va Jay Jay wit my tongue, and kissed her afterwards.  BUT, she had a problem wit me havin' cheeseburger breath?!?

#Random: Who's gonna take care of all tha caucasian babies,  if they come up wit new laws to keep brown folks out of tha country? See...Black folks did it for tha first couple of centuries, now its time for us, to pass tha torch to tha brown folks.

#Random: Am I tha only one that Masturbates, and gets a "Ice Cream Headache/ Brain freeze" sometimes?

#Random: Why do some of the american people confuse our president wit bein' a male version of "Glenda tha good Witch" from The Wiz?!? Look,  he can only do so much. Sure..He's gonna make some miscues. And sure, he's gonna have some success. BUT.. stop thinkin' he's gonna appear to you phucks and say "Click ya heels  3 times, and this sh!t is over"

#Random: I think me and Rodney Allen Rippy were separated at birth. (Google him children.) If so, I want some of that "Jack In The Box" money sonnnn!!!

#Random: Ya ever notice that,  if some people have to show you what they do, they must not be that good at it in tha first place? (Yeah...i'm on that Socrates sh!t today sonnn...)

#Random: Why do some women ride that fine line between prostitution and relationship nowdays? (Send all "Phuck You" mail to mayhemm09@gmail.com  )

#Random: Why are people so brave when e-mailin'/textin' etc...but can't pick up the damn phone (When applicable) and communicate?!?

#Random: Fellas have you ever just asked for a hand job, only because you knew gettin' anything else would require too much work?

#Random: Ladies..Have you ever gave a guy some tail, just to shut his azz up?

#Random: I went to see a friend's kid in a high school musical. Now...is it me or is bein' gay at an early age becomin' more trendy?!? Look..If you're gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, into Hamsters and Ferrets, That's fine. If that's your walk in life, I support it. (AGAIN...Send all "Phuck You Matt" mail to mayhemm09@Gmail.com ) What i'm sayin' is that, I never really seen such an outbreak of wantin'to be gay, when I was in high school. I mean...sh!t we knew some folks were gonna go that way, but they waited after high school. Now... high schoolers look like they're in fashion shows sponsored by Kanye West and Rupaul wit a side of Rihanna.

*Reaches for damp towel.* And now if you'll excuse me, I have Bukakke session to get to. Hopefully, i'll miss her hair this time.






mayhemm09@gmail.com    twitter.com/mayhemm09  facebook.com/matt.lloyd3 

Be Afraid. Be Effin' Afraid.

IT'S HERE!...IT HERE! TURN THIS ISH ON 10!!!!





AND THENNNNN......







AND I'M SPENT.



FACEBOOK.COM/MATT.LLOYD3    TWITTER.COM/MAYHEMM09   

MAYHEMM09@GMAIL.COM   

Reeeallly? I can't effin' breathe...

You can't be Phuckin' serious?!?

Am I tha only one doubled over, urinating on himself ,laffin' at this at 3A.M.?!?



#ImmatureYesIAm.


ANNNND.......

I'm amazed and doubled over, at tha same time. I'm doubled over cause' this ish is hil-la-effin-rious. I'm amazed because, this sounds better than, most of tha accomplished Hip Hop artists, wit new projects out. *Effin Sigh*

My Soapbox...

There's not too many people that can paint a suitable depiction of Us. Every once in a while, you run across one......







Vintage...is sometimes best for our times....





But we at one point, must adapt, to our surroundings...







facebook.com/matt.lloyd3  twitter.com/mayhemm09


mayhemm09@gmail.com  

I do Random.

*Cue song "Not Afraid" by Eminem. Sits up in bed, looks down at my "Cleveland Show" Underroos, wonders why he has'nt changed underwear in a few days.* *Reaches over for his laptop to sprew forth tha followin'....*

I really got to stop phuckin' around wit Abilify, and a Oxycodone chaser. Not only does it affect my judgement on sh!t, it affects my views. Wit that said, This ish right heeerre... is just random.

#Random: Ladies, I am a firm believer in that you're ALL beautiful. Tha only thing, to me, that makes a woman unattractive,  is her attitude. (Read and cherish that statement AGAIN.) BUUUUT..... Ladies, ya gotta be honest about your attitude and wardrobe situation. Not all of you can pull off wearin' a damn baby tee. I mean...sh!t. Is it me, or tha women wit tha highest self esteem, have tha most jacked up azz attitude, and body symetry?!?

It's always tha woman that looks like Michael Clarke Duncan in a baby tee, wants to tell me how "Her milkshake brings all tha boys to tha yard". Really?!? how about you get a side order ofhumility wit that Milkshake. Or ease up off tha milkshakes. #JustSayin'

#Random: Men are soooo phuckin' quick to say they're "Grown". BUUUT...some of us can't get past, that "Catch a girl, kiss a girl" stage of life. Now, some of us have matured into somewhat decent human beings, wit a sense of self. (Me go poopy by myself.) Some of us should be declared "Ghetto Autistic" (For my Caucasian  fanbase, "Bush 2001-2009". To my Hispanic fanbase, "El  Geeeto Stupidio")

Really?!? Ya ever notice that tha loudest one in tha room, is always tha one not really sayin' anything,  worth a sh!t? Fellas...try bein' quiet. Reflect before you direct. (I'm a profound azz today...*Smacks own azz*)

#Random: I should reeeally get out more. These lil' nuggets I came up wit, came from just people watchin', on tha way to tha clinic. (Don't worry future baby mothers, tha itchin' has died down considerably.) Just think of tha ish I can come up wit, just milling around tha multitudes again.

#Random: Tha truth about me is, my mom had an affair wit Antonio Fargus, and tha guy who installed our "On T.V." (Remember tham sh!ts?) and made me.

#Random: ALL Brown liquor (And some premium Vodkas) should be called "World look sooo goood" juice.

#Random: Ya ever notice people who do "Reality TV" shows, have so sense of what their reality is?

#Random:Ya ever notice when some people tell you they're a "Actor/Singer/Dancer/Entertainer" they neglect to tell you, its only as far as Facebook?!? (*Self-esteem swirls around tha toliet bowl.*)

#Random : Ya ever notice that sometimes, even tha most nonsense statements, at one point in life make sense?

#Random: Deep in your subconscious, tha last question is gonna bug tha Phuck out of you.





Now,  if you would excuse me, i've got some restraining orders to violate.
FIND ME.     facebook.com/matt.lloyd3   twitter.com/mayhemm09    mayhemm09@gmail.com

PSA:Tha Banger to end all Bangers comin' this Summer..

STAY TUNED...THIS IS JUST THA BEGINNING.

#Classic

Learn somethin' before it's done.